There have been many times, especially when I was in the middle of something that I didn’t want, that I believed life wouldn’t change. Logically I knew it eventually would change, but emotionally I certainly felt much different.
“When will it get better?”
I can remember times that I have felt sad or angry over something going on, or not going on in my life.
When you really want something to happen, it never comes fast enough. When you want to move past a situation, it can feel like it will never end!
I’m spending a relaxing vacation this week at the beach with my guy. Yesterday, a short time after sunrise, we walked along the boardwalk and enjoyed the view of the ocean and the quiet of early morning.
We’d planned so long for this vacation! We found our house in the winter and booked it the day that we saw it. We talked endlessly, especially during the last few weeks, about the day that we would begin our wonderful time away. Now, here we were together, away with his two daughters; finally enjoying sun and fun with each other.
As he and I chatted and walked along the beach, it occurred to me how different my life was 2 years ago. I shared my reflection with him.
“Two years ago, a vacation with you like this did not even exist for me.” “We weren’t even dating!” We both smiled, and gave each other a hug.
Two years ago I was in the middle of a situation that was not very happy or fun for me. Two years ago I remember wondering, “When will it get better?” That feeling of heaviness weighed down on my chest at times, and the fun that he and I now share together was nowhere in my radar of possibilities that I could see for myself.
But this is what happens when you are in the middle of a crappy time in your life! It seems never ending…and even though you logically know that the unhappy time won’t last, the unhappy time seems to drag on, and so does the feeling.
When you don’t have something you really want, it seems like it will never come.
I like to remind myself that change is constant,even when you don’t believe it.
I like to remind myself that there are wonderful experiences I am yet to have that might not be in my immediate radar. This is a bit easier to do from my happy now, I can reflect back and see how far I have come, and I have proof that even when you don’t believe it, even when you can’t conceive it, happy times are possible……life DOES change.
So I will take this little reflection and tuck it in my pocket, pull it out for future reference….
I’m sure there will be times when I am in the middle of something crappy, and I probably wont believe that it will ever change. I’ll probably forget that change is constant. When emotions take over, it’s easy to forget logic. To have a tool in my pocket to remind me is helpful though.
This morning as I wrote this blog, I shared my reflection with his youngest daughter and her friend. I think they really liked the idea that there are some wonderful future experiences they will have and new people they will meet, and that in this very moment they just might not be able to see exactly who and what that is.
After all, two years ago I didn’t know either of his daughters, and we have become very close. They are two additions to my life that I never imagined.
Life is funny that way, change IS constant…..even when you don’t believe it.
Love & Fireworks,